I am too busy to even write this

STOP GLORIFYING BEING BUSY.  This was a sign I saw recently.  How stupid, I thought as I busily rushed about doing something.  And then..  that thought and what it meant kept returning to me over and over.  My life is really really busy.  I work ridiculous hours and when I return home I still want to be an attentive mother and wife, both of which I regularly fail at.  I am constantly wishing for more time, to deal with my other non work life, time with my family and friends, time to relax, just time.  So, if all the time I am being busy I am wanting to slow down and do less, why am I placing so much value on being busy?  I often recount the huge amount of things I did in a day wanting to instill awe at my great powers of multitasking and my herculean effort.  Do the things I accomplish amount to my own way of seeing my self worth?  How often do I enviously listen to a friend or my husband tell of how relaxing their day was, only to translate relaxing to lazy? I usually only 'allow' myself the reward of relaxing if I feel I have accomplished enough. I think I am ready to work on this behaviour.  I would like to relax and not feel guilty.  So.. I made meringues.  Maybe not the most relaxing and  forgiving of experiments, but I was reading cookbooks and was looking at Ottolenghi's towering tributes to sugar and I could imagine standing in front of his shop in London and pointing out all the different kinds of meringues to my daughter.  So I dove in.  Not as high and towering as his are, slightly crestfallen if you will; or maybe just relaxed but delicious either way.  Crunchy on the outside and soft like a sweet pillow on the inside.  Try it.


Chocolate Pistachio Meringues:
makes 12 large meringues

3 cups superfine sugar
10 1/2 ounces of free range egg whites (about 10)
1/2 cup pistachio nuts finely chopped
1/4 cup dark cocoa powder

Preheat the oven to 400F.  Spread sugar evenly over a large parchment lined baking sheet.  Place the pan in the oven for approx 8 minutes or until the edges are beginning to dissolve.

While the sugar is in the oven, put the egg whites in a mixer bowl.  When the sugar is almost ready, start mixing the egg whites on high speed for about a minute or until the whites are just beginning to froth up.

Carefully pour the hot sugar into the whisking whites.  Continue to whisk on high for ten minutes and the meringue is cold.  At this point it should keep a stiff peak when lifted and be uniformly glossy.

Turn the oven down to 225F.  Swirl the cocoa through the meringue mixture but do not mix in.  Swirls of cocoa instead of a uniform brown is what you want.  Using a large spoon scoop up the meringue.  Scrape the meringue off of the spoon with another spoon onto a parchment prepared pan.  Sprinkle the pistachio over the top.  Remember the meringues will double in size in the oven so give them space to expand and not touch eachother.

Leave in oven for  2 hours.  The outside will be completely firm and the inside still a little soft. Remove from oven and let cool.  They will keep in a dry place at room temp for a week.

(photo by Hamid Attie)

Take a bit of time today to relax and do something for your soul.